The American Dream, what does that mean, and more importantly what has chasing it done to us?

The other day in an oratory about some friends who were looking for work, I mentioned the American Dream and this morning at the beach I was contemplating what that really means. The term was first coined in the 1930’s and I think it was a byproduct of the industrial revolution. Before that, the American Dream may have meant something a little different, I think. When old Thomas Jefferson penned the words, “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.” I doubt he had ANY idea what they would come to mean a scant 233 years later. When James Truslow published his book, “The Epic of America” the dialog revolved around that dream of a land in which life should be better and richer and fuller for everyone, with opportunity for each according to ability or achievement. Martin Luther King Jr. pulled from that sentiment when he spoke in his “I have a Dream” speech. Click here for the entire speech, it is a great speech. http://www.usconstitution.net/dream.html The American Dream is not supposed to be about fancy cars and high wages and all the materialistic things money brings. It is supposed to be a dream about the social order, a social order in which each man and each woman shall be able to achieve to the fullest extent possible, limited only by their individual capabilities. Our situation or station in life should not be reached, or enjoyed, simply because of a fortuitous circumstance of birth or societal position.

I believe that this might be the sentiment that was considered when the founding fathers spoke, putting those words in our constitution. I think somehow our American Dream has been hijacked, hijacked to mean something else altogether. I feel it has come to mean “I got more stuff than you” and as George Carlin used to say, it is my stuff and your shit. Which is kinda the issue, why do we think we have to have more stuff, to show off? The words to that Waylon Jennings song, Lukenbach Texas keeps ringing in my head. He sings on about this successful life we're livin' got us feudin' like the Hatfields and McCoys. He talks about how busy they’ve been keepin' up with the Jones, four-car garage and we're still building on. Keeping up with the Joneses is a catchphrase, referring to the comparison to one's neighbor as a benchmark for social caste or the accumulation of material goods. To not keep up with the Joneses might be perceived as demonstrating socio-economic or cultural inferiority and God forbid that! In the days of McMansions and overly extravagant vehicles and gigantic big screen televisions, I think we are missing the point of it all. It has changed from living the dream, a peaceful, relaxing and emotionally rewarding thing to a ridiculous rat race to accumulate a big assed pile of latest and greatest material things. I am not sure how it turned from one to the other, but change it did.

So what has this shift in understanding and meaning of the American Dream done to us? I, of course, have some thoughts on that. We have done it to ourselves, with our distorted view of what success is. Success, to me, is having my health, finding a great mate, leading a good life, being happy and being able to pay the bills. I look on in sheer amazement as I see parents passing this crazy assed, unrealistic drive to achieve to their kids. The pressure is applied even before kids get to kindergarten for petes sake! The expectations that parents are pushing on their children to be high achievers seems crazy to me. I do have to have a disclaimer here, I do not have kids but that will not stop me from passing judgment on those who do. So we set these little ones up for this when they are still tricycle motors and from my perspective we are robbing them of the chance to have a carefree childhood. When I was a kid, I do not remember that kind of pressure and I assure you there was no fast paced pre-school in my world. Although I bet if it would have been available and my Mom could have afforded it, my troublesome little ass would have been sent, just to get me out of her hair. I was allowed, and expected to be a kid when I was a kid. That’s right, allowed and expected! I was encouraged to play and daydream and ponder the meaning of stupid things. Why, because that is what helps a kid develop into a well-rounded adult. Developing into a well-rounded adult does not involve pressure from preschool.

Ya know what else was different, there were none of my childhood peers taking Ritalan and ADD and ADHD were taken care of with a big wooden paddle, my Mom had several. So how did we get here, where we place so much importance on the non-important things, when considering the bigger picture of happiness in life? The race for all the materialist things has made our lives about that race and not about the everyday moments that we should be enjoying. Simple things that still make me sit in amazement, things like the Sunrise or how a hibiscus flower slowly opens in the morning. We are so busy with other things that most of us seem to miss the point. It is about the ride, not the destination. The American Dream should be a way of living our life, we should truly live and enjoy every moment of every day. The American Dream should NOT be a place that we can reach, by being able to get into that McMansion or being able to afford (with credit) that new Mercedes. I took this week off to “douche my brain” as one of my friends called it. To look at the clouds and daydream. Daydreaming is so important and we, as a society do not encourage it nearly enough, if at all. Without day dreamers where would we be? What if Wernher von Braun had never day dreamed, we might not have had the Saturn 5 rocket that carried men to the moon. What if Martine Rothblatt had not daydreamed, we might not have satellite radio today. What if some others had unbelievable pressure applied before the age of 5, would Thomas Edison have given us so many of the common place items in our lives today? Would Bill Gate and Steve Jobs have given us all the cool gadgets and software to run them? I think NOT!

The current economic situation has forced us to place a higher importance on our jobs, many are without work and with cutbacks it is important to do a good job. There is a distinction there though that should not be overlooked. We are not what we do and we should not allow our work to define who we are. If the Dream is about a way to live our life, then that has nothing to do with work. I refuse to be defined by what I do, the easiest way to prove this to yourself is this. If you won the lotto would you go back to work? For me that would be a HELL NO! My work is a means to an end, I use my job to support my life. I TRY VERY hard not to get that confused. When we have ourselves completely wrapped up in what we do and some economic or other situation that is of no fault of our own comes along, it makes our lives very hard. Well I am glad I can afford all my bills and still have a roof over my head and most of all I am HAPPY, HAPPY that I can take some time off to stare at the clouds and daydream. I am HAPPY I can watch the sunrise and contemplate the meaning of life. I am HAPPY that I can look at flowers and still be amazed at “how does that happen.” I hope and pray most of all that I never lose my sense of wonder, my sense of wonder about any of it and all of it.

I have one parting thought about the chase for more stuff, which is what I think the American Dream has turned into. If you do not play, you can not loose, that’s right - If you do not play, you can not loose. So as long as we are not fertilizing the grass, everything else is butter cream icing on a big ole cake!