Wednesday, June 20, 2018


Roy Eudy - September 25, 1944, to June 8, 2018


I first saw Roy on the beach while I was watching sunrises in Jacksonville Florida, this had to be late 2008 early 2009.  He was a regular walker and his timing coincided with my sunrise watching.  We did little more than acknowledge each other’s existence there at the beginning.  It was dark, it was early and who the hell knows what sorts of people are at the beach that time of the morning.  Seemed normal to me.  After his walk he would also drag his chair out to the beach with a cup of something and relax for a bit before leaving again.  Again, nothing more than a head nod at this point.

One day I get to the beach and as I am walking out a woman stopped me and asked if I had seen a dude, I told her that I had just arrived so no.  I didn’t think anything about it, as I said early at the beach brings all sorts of folks.  So, I was out in my chair and the next thing I know the beach is crawling with Cops.  It did not take them long to come and ask me some questions, about that woman.  Turns out she was sexually assaulted on the beach right before I got there.  As the cops are stringing up yellow tape and asking questions of everyone who even wandered by I asked Roy, who I did not know his name until that moment what he saw.  He, like me saw nothing.

After that we talked a bit more each time we saw each other and eventually ended up sitting together to watch the sun come up.  We started out with small talk about the beach and the sunrise and eventually about our lives, our professions and the challenges we each had along the way.  We started occasionally catching breakfast at the Beach Hut CafĂ© (https://www.facebook.com/Beach-Hut-Cafe-136175383061413/) after sun rise. 

One day I noticed the Texas longhorn on his car, is was very similar to the longhorn depicted in the Ranchero (Jalopy) badging.  It gave us another connection as Bride lived in Austin back in the day and Roy went to school there.  He was there back in 66 when the University of Texas Tower shooting took place, and knew some of the victims.  Some of his stories about that event were incredibly sad.  But back to the longhorn, I remember how devastated he was when it came off, or was stolen he wasn’t sure.  He ended up with a replacement from someone back in TX.


I don’t recall how many sunrises it took before he brought up the death of his son, Roy Jr. but I do recall it being a turning point in our relationship from one of acquaintances who enjoyed the beach to that of friends, friends who shared our lives with each other.  He had so much anguish about his death and rightly so but also what happened to and in his life after his son’s death.  He ended up getting divorced and had some issues with alcohol that slowed down his getting past those events.  He was a non drinker as long as I knew him.  It hurt my heart to listen and I remember that was the first time I gave him a hug, but it was not the last.    

He also talked a lot about his daughter’s divorce, it pained him a lot to see her going through that.   As much as it pained him to see her struggling with divorce, it hurt his soul when he thought about what his grand kids were enduring in the process.  He wished that they lived closer together or that they would move to Florida from California, which they eventually did.  We talked about it a lot over time, many more hugs were involved. 

I was with him on the beach watching sunrise when my sister called me to give me the news that my Dad was being flown to a bigger hospital for a surgery that would save his life, my Dad had many health issues.  Roy and I talked about that a bit and then I headed home.  Later, on my way home my Sister called to let me know that my Dad had passed.  I called Roy to let him know, he had asked that I keep him updated.  I told him I was heading to Ohio for the funeral.    

By this time we were good friends and I had invited him to attend a surprise (for Bride) renewal of our vows at the 20 year mark in 2010.  http://mroatmealsoratories.blogspot.com/2010/09/i-recently-experienced-most-special-day.html.  That was quite a special day for us and I was glad Roy agreed to come to our sunrise wedding. 

Bride and I for many years invited folks over to thanksgiving who may not have had family in town or for whatever reason were going to be alone.  I asked Roy to join us Thanksgiving, which he started doing every year until we moved from Florida and Oregon.  He was always so polite and fun to be around, some of the dinner crowd changed every year, there were a few exceptions to that and Roy was one of those exceptions.  So many stories and so many good memories.   

He was a member of The Club Continental in Orange park and on a few occasions we would go over there for breakfast or lunch.  It was a very nice place and all the folks there knew and apparently loved him.  They were always very nice and attentive to us, even more so than other guests.  I don’t recall him ever saying how long he was a member but I know he enjoyed going there.  That place also had great view over the St. Johns River.   I seem to recall a pretty kick ass BLT as well.  

I remember when he started having vision issues and talked about having to have a surgery, on both eyes.  He really did not want to do it but finally came around the realization that he had to get it done.  He was then super nervous about how he was going to get over there (south of orange park) and back to his place off Atlantic by San Pablo.  It took some convincing but finally he agreed to let me take him.  He had one done, and then a pretty comprehensive regime of drops and pills and checkups.  Then the other eye and the same routine.  It took him way longer to recover than they had lead him to believe. 

Roy also told me he wanted to purchase one of my sunrise pictures.  I asked which one?  He told me to pick my favorite one.  I have taken thousands, how was I to pick just one favorite.  After a few weeks of careful consideration I picked one that was simply spectacular.  It had the ocean, some great clouds and the bright lights of sunrise, AND, it had a seagull coasting around.  It is still amongst my favorites, I always thought how awesome it must be for that seagull, being able to experience all this beauty and to be able to soar through it – awesome.  I had that pic blown way up and framed for him. 

I could go on telling storied all day I suspect.  But I think the thing that I will cherish the most is just our friendship, two dudes who met on a beach while watching the sunrise and became friends.  Some days we would be sitting there in our chairs watching and not say 10 words to each other – morning Roy and see ya later Roy was the extent of the conversation some days, even if we sat for an hour watching. 

I will miss you Roy Eudy, thank you for being my friend – I am a better person for having known you!

Here he is with my Niece,