So this oratory is going to explain what a bogo on the blue bell is and how it came to have its meaning.

As you know by now my Niece from Ohio has moved in with us and we have been getting along great. We seem to be two peas in a pod, for me it reinforces the new genetic findings that have recently re-opened the acrimonious nature versus nurture debate. I used to be on the other side of the argument believing that environment plays a bigger role than genetics when it comes to how people evolve into who they are. My Niece and I have never even lived within 1000 miles of each other and for some reason we have very similar senses of humor and outlooks on life and how to act, it is still a bit scary for me as the similarities continue to mount. I was truly shocked that of all the things I thought would change in my life with my Niece living with us, the very foundations of my understanding of life was not one of them. My whole life it has been environment, environment, environment and I believed, obviously falsely, that genetics had very little to do with who we are – WRONG! My Niece is living proof of my shattered understanding of how all the pieces of life’s puzzle fit together, like I needed that right now. I am very, very happy she is with us, it has forced me to reevaluate things in my life, starting I guess with the very core of my foundational understanding of building blocks of life itself, whodathunk it?

Last weekend I went over to one of my best friends home to affect some repairs and my Niece tagged along, lots of reasons for that but like always that is a story for another day. After a couple of hours and the home repair behind us we were on our way home, the trip had a planned grocery store stop in it so I had to decide which store I could hit on the way home. I am a creature of habit and the thought of going to a different Publix was initially a bit scary for me, where would they keep the Pirates Gold marinate? Would they stock the same kind of potato’s in the same location? I damn near said NO, I will go out of my way to my Publix but since this one was right on the way home and I had been in the facility previously I felt I could make it work. So we are tooling down Atlantic boulevard and I look up and low and behold I see a bill board with a Publix advertisement. OK, I remember thinking, this was the sign I was looking for to aid me in making the decision to stop or not. I was not expecting such a literal interpretation of a sign. Little did I know that this quick glance at a bill board zipping down Atlantic boulevard at 45 miles per hour would FOREVER change both our lives, in the most humorous way.

So for those who shop at Publix you know that they always have the buy one get one free shelves set up in various locations around the store, for those who don’t you get the idea. I am not sure who the advertising agency was that came up with a term bogo for buy one get one free but I have always thought it was catchy, I believe it was a shoe store originally but it does not really matter. Anyway I have used the term bogo for quite a while, bogo on peanuts, yummy, bogo on spaghetti and bogo on the spaghetti sauce, I like saying it and I like getting one of two items for free. So the advertisement on the bill board was for a buy one get one free on Blue Bell ice cream so I said, bogo on the Blue Bell, speaking of the deal on Blue Bell ice cream, which is very good by the way. I first tasted Blue Bell ice cream on a trip to Austin when we stopped in Brenham Texas and that was YEARS before they expanded and started selling Blue Bell ice cream nationwide. Anyway, after I said bogo on the blue bell my niece says that sounds nice, it rolls off your tongue and it should mean something that is commonly used, bogo on the blue bell. This is where we should have left it, but her and I both favor taking things just that one additional step.

We went through many iterations before the final definition, we initially thought it had to mean something good because Blue Bell Ice cream is so good. NO we decided, because that is just what they would expect us to do, we decided the antithesis of good is what we needed it to be. I can’t remember how many different ideas we came up with, I liked some, she didn’t, she liked some, I didn’t. I was beginning to think we may be on a fools errand and we should have left it well enough alone. Through the pandemonium I do not even know which of us came up with it but when it was spoken aloud we both immediately knew we had the absolute perfect definition, we had created a new definition for BOGO on the Blue Bell – and it had nothing to do with ice cream. Basically, it would be a way to describe a person who was doing something odd or bizarre and most importantly – it would be something that was memorable. Not just a little bit odd either but something so memorable that if by chance you were gazing over a crowd of over 1000 people the BOGO on the Blue Bell would be immediately apparent to even the most casual observer and anyone who knew the definition would be able to immediately pick that person out. It would require no more explanation, finger pointing or any other means of identification, everyone would know immediately who you were speaking about. We did not learn until later that once a BOGO on the Blue Bell was identified they also had to classified, What you ask, yes classified into either the buy one or the get one free, which by the way makes the entire process more enjoyable. So if you remember back to old crazy legs from my last oratory you can imagine that there would be NO doubt who we were speaking about when we looked at each other and said “BOGO on the Blue Bell” at the exact same instant, we knew and it was FUNNY.

So if you and I are ever out in public together and you hear me mutter the words “BOGO on the Blue Bell” take a look around and you will know immediately who needs to checked out for a humorous giggle and we can share the moment.