Are you a real person or are you “What you do” for a living?

Have you ever noticed at an outing meeting new people we tend to ask and ask ourselves, “what do you do”? We tend to immediately go into (in agonizing detail sometimes) what we do for a living. Why is that? I am guilty of it myself, but I recognize it as a trend and that concerns me. Why is it that we respond that way? Do we seek to be accepted? Do we want people to know how important we are? Do we need to justify to ourselves what we do for a living? Do we secretly want people to know how much money we make? I am not sure and I have pondered it quite a bit. So why do we do that, looking at the bigger picture, what difference does it make? That small distinction is HUGE for me.

I do not want to be defined solely by what I do for a living, I would much rather be defined by what kind of human being I am. Don’t get me wrong here – I love what I do and where I do it. I work in the non-profit sector and working at a mission based organization is very rewarding for me professionally. I derive a great deal of personal satisfaction from being able to do things because they are the “right” thing to do more so than just because it might be profitable. When I win the lotto I will not be working anymore -- that to me is proof that any job is nothing more than a means for me to support the life I lead.

So what is the right answer to the question, “what do you do?” For me, I am going to try very hard to answer like this.

What do you do? I love my wife and feel blessed she married me, I am fortunate that both my parents are still with me, and I have three siblings that I love. I try to thank all the people who are involved in getting me the food I eat, kinda like saying grace if you believe in that. I have, since my grannie’s funeral, been very successful in getting a stranger to smile very day. I volunteer for things bigger than me. I try very hard to do that at least 10 hours per month of volunteer work in my community, although right now I am between projects. I still stop to help people who are broken down along side of the road, I drive a 51 year old jalopy so I have been there and have a great number of those tee shirts. I laugh about what I will do with my lotto winnings for at least a half an hour a week -- where else can you get that much entertainment for a buck? And that is “what I do” I assure you that answer will make the asker take a step back.

If the questioner continues with the follow up questions, you can continue defining yourself. Questions such as “no I meant what do you do for a living”? The answer, for me, could be I work at a place that provides programming and services that celebrates human diversity, encourages joyful learning and promotes civic participation all to empower citizens to improve the quality of their lives. That is the mission statement of where I work. So if your inquisitor has not gotten the point yet and asks no, no what do you actually do for a job? The reply could be as simple as, I work on a team that hooks up wires and operates the electronic systems. So hopefully by now the questioner will get the point. I will not be defined or allow someone to define me on their mental charts of what my status or ranking is or where I land on the socioeconomic ladder.

I have lead a very blessed, fortunate and fulfilling life and that, is NOT directly related to what I did to make the money that made that life possible. Anyone reading this also has lead a blessed and fortunate life, a computer an internet connection are not rights and many millions in the world do not have those “conveniences”, dare I say it, “luxuries.” When we put the small things we take for granted into perspective we begin to realize just how very lucky we are, or at least we sure should, and it usually has very little to do with “what we do”

So the next time someone asks you “what do you do” see how long you can hold them off.