The axis on which my world spins just took a 28.76 degree tilt to the left, and I am NOT happy!

This morning at exactly 6:38am my day and possibly my entire life was drastically altered in a most detrimental way. The day started, like any other day, with a shower and ironing my shirt for work. Normal enough so far, I then got my phone off the charger and picked up the camera, wallet, badge and keys. I had all the items needed to get my day off to a great start, I kissed bride and kicked the dog and out the door I went. I did not jalopy ride today as I knew it was suppose to rain and I do not like driving her in the rain. I also did not really kick the dog, that was more for theatrical effect. So down the road I go, I was looking over to the east to see how the sunrise was looking. I am always looking for an opportunity to get a great picture and with the new Nikon S6000 point and shoot so cheap and I keep one with me almost always. I noticed that I might get a good shot once I got to work.

About half way to work I stopped at a Gate Station to get my coffee, a morning ritual for many years. When I smoked I had just enough time to get a smoke in with my coffee before I got to work. I noticed when I walked in that they had some fine looking bananas today so I grabbed one. It has been a few weeks since I have gotten a really good looking and tasting nanner. Some days they are a bit ratty looking but not today. I know that 59 cents is way too much for one nanner but since I did not have any at home I had no choice. I walk around to the coffee station and to my surprise all 6 pots that hold normal coffee were empty, the store was busy and Ms. Martha was working by herself this morning. I quickly ground the beans and started up 4 pots, the max they can brew at one time. I got two more filters ready with coffee in them for when these 4 pots were done. Once the first pot was completed I filled up my cup and then started two more pots of the nectar of the Gods and got in line behind the 4 other folks waiting there to pay. Upon arrival at the counter I told her I had a new cup, I usually have a refill. New cup costs $1.59 but if I refill the cup from yesterday it is only .96.

I went to the wallet for cash and my coffee card. The coffee/drink card is a deal they do, if you by 5 cups of coffee or buy 5 fountain drinks you get the next one for free. I had three full cards in my wallet, I save them for days I have no cash. Just because I am broke does not negate my need for coffee in the morning so proper planning is important here. She tells me my coffee is on the house for catching the coffee station up. I love getting a free cup of coffee, when that happens there is nothing in the day that can ruin my great mood, or so I thought. Just this side of winning the lotto is a free cup of coffee and a free donut, in my opinion, is the start of a perfect day. Ms. Martha has worked for gate for almost 20 years and been at this store for nearly 10, I have made a lot of coffee for her and we know each other well. I have hung around in the store before when a customer was acting fishy or walked around customers when it appeared they might be attempting to shop lift something.

So while I was waiting in line I had already grabbed an empty coffee drink card and was about to place it in my wallet when things started going very wrong. It was so bad that I almost dropped my nanner. The new cards require me to buy six drinks before I get a free one. WHAT!!!! The old cards only required one to purchase five drinks before we got a free one. I started to ask her about what was happening there but the lines were long and I was obviously in shock so I decided not to inquire further at this time. I was in shock, literally in shock, I drove to work in a daze, not understanding what could have happened. In my professional life, I am an agent of change, in the technology field the only constant is change. In my personal life, however I do not adapt as well to changes. I am still pissed off about Captain Crunch changing the berries from red only to red, green, blue and purple and even more pissed about them changing Apple Jacks from orange only to orange and green – what the hell’s up that anyway. There was nothing wrong with those cereals the way they were. I am not sure how many years ago those changes were made but I am still not happy about it.

I stopped into the gate on my way home to get the skinny on the changes, I know the clerks on every shift for that particular store. Well come to find out it has everything to do with the fountain drink costs. Seems those costs have gone up and to keep the balance in costs they needed to step up to 6 drinks before we get one for free. Well I was all over that and asked why is that affecting the coffee refills then I asked??? Well she told me that because they only have one card that was the way it was. I am pretty sure I will be writing a letter to the corporate headquarters of Gate to get the final answer to that question. In the mean time I am now attempting to figure out a way to cope with these drastic changes in my morning routine, I mean don’t they know what impact this change will have on people like me?

Please join in a revolt and let us see if we can effect change at Gate, I want those cards changed back to buying 5 cups and getting one for free. Here is a picture of both cards, get a good look at the card with 5 little cups as it will probably be the last time you ever see them.

A complaint letter I sent to Waffle House

Good morning,

It is with a saddened heart that I am writing to you today. I love Waffle House and have been eating at your places for years, some time back I even wrote a blog about how great your restaurants are. Here is a link to that Blog, http://mroatmealsoratories.blogspot.com/2009/07/waffle-house-is-best_15.html.

So, on July 25th, 2010 my Wife and I were on our way back to Florida from a family picnic that was held south of Fort Worth and we stopped at store 1765, located at 1120 west highway 67, Alvarado, TX 76009, the time was at 1:38 in the afternoon. Our visit was by far, the worse visit I have ever had to a Waffle House and I have eaten at Waffle Houses from right to left and from the top to the bottom of this Great Country. It started bad and I should have taken it as an omen when we were not greeted with a “hello, welcome to Waffle House” when we walked in the door. I really enjoy that because I can think of no other place that greets the customers when they walk in each and every time, it was one of the initial draws for me.

We took a seat in a booth and although neither of needed to look at the menu’s, they were laid out as placemats. The person, who I would later learn was our server, was trying to make time with another server. We commented to each other about her apparent lack of interest in him and his eagerness to impress her and of course his lack of interest in us, the paying customers. Anyway, after about three minutes he breaks ranks with her and comes over to take our drink orders, still no welcome to Waffle House. I ordered water and a milk with my meal and my Wife ordered orange juice. When he leaves our table, he makes his way back over to talk to the female server. After a few minutes he brings us two waters, my wife tells him, I ordered orange juice to which he replied, “oh yeah, I forgot – but keep the water.” No worries I thought he is young and obviously not thinking about us but the other server. He stops and talks to her again before going and getting the orange juice. When he returns he asks if we are ready to order, we are and we do. My Wife ordered a ham, mushroom and cheese omelet, scattered hash browns and a waffle and I ordered waffle and a bacon egg and cheese sandwich.

So then Romeo goes back over to the female server and is back in deep conversation, and I noted the time because I wanted to see how long it would take him to actually place our order – it was almost 3 and a half minutes. I was irritated but took it in stride and we were able to laugh about the follies of youth. We are watching, another part I enjoy, our meal being prepared. The ring was flipped down for the hash browns, the eggs for the omelet are placed in the blender cup and some plates were put out. At the waffle station I saw an amazing site, it was filthy and looked as if it had not been cleaned in days, it was so bad I took a picture, enclosed. There were three of the plastic tubs there with waffle mix in them, odd I remember thinking but by this time, I already had determined there was something amiss at this Waffle House. The cook was scraping the three containers, looking for enough batter for our waffles I suppose. The eggs were still whirring away in the blender. Finally, he goes and gets a new tub of batter from the fridge, it looks as thick as old porridge as he deposits the blobs on the waffle irons. I almost cancelled the order then but I was really looking forward to a great waffle.

The cook finally takes the eggs off the blender, they were for sure whipped by now I remember thinking. He proceeds to make our order, I knew already that the waffles were not going to make it at the same time as our meal. I noticed when our order was complete our server, still engaged with the female server, was slow to go and get our food and bring it to us. He finally brings my sandwich and my Wife’s omelet and hash browns. I was shocked at the hash browns, they were by no means scattered. They were obviously cooked in the ring and never removed - one side was burnt, the other had never touched the grilling surface – it resembled a hockey puck. I have never received scattered hash browns that looked so poor. The omelet was about three inches thick, a result of the over blending the eggs I assume. As such, it did not cook correctly and was an odd shade of light brown. My sandwich was delivered on burned white toast, not slightly over toasted but burnt to the point the crust was blackened. There were also no pickles and mayonnaise on the plate, not that I eat them every time but I get a reassured feeling just knowing they are there. Wow, I remember thinking this is really bad for a waffle house, I had no idea at that point that it could have gotten any worse. As we start to eat an employee, the only one who appeared to be actually working was sweeping the floor, she came right by our table with her broom going 90 to nothing. The floor was disgusting so I understand why she was sweeping but the debris cloud she was raising, at our table, did not make the already poor meal anymore more enjoyable.

Our waffles finally came, we were nearly done eating by this time, mine was covered with little black things. When I asked the server what are all these little black things he said “it must be some burnt stuff that was left on the grill” I was shocked! I was in the process of cutting that section off when he was explaining that. I handed him the ticket he just dropped on the table and asked that the waffles be removed from the bill, which he did. So, we are making our way through this awful food, we just want to get it behind us and get on our way, which is why we stopped at a Waffle House in the first place – fast and good food. It is then that the employee, sweeping chores now completed stopped by to refill the sugar dispenser. She asked me if I minded handing it to her so she did not have to reach across the table – at least she asked I suppose. She then proceeded to stand at our table and fill the sugar dispenser from a giant whitish clear pitcher, not 18 inches away from where we are eating. We are working our way through this substandard meal talking about stopping at some other Waffle House further up the road by this time.

I noticed an older employee (obviously the only adult supervision in this store I thought) as we were getting ready to leave and I thought I would mention my dissatisfaction to her as I was paying my tab, I had no idea this visit could get still worse. As I approached the counter the woman I was going to talk to starts spraying down something with a hose that is right beside the counter and proceeds to slash who knows what all over me, my wife, the two guests at the counter and the register. She cackles with laughter and says to one of the younger employees to clean the register. I responded with, maybe you should be more worried about spraying the customers than cleaning the register. The blank stare I received told me that there was indeed no adult supervision at this store and it would do no good to mention anything to her, her incompetence level would not allow her to begin to comprehend the damage she was doing to the Waffle House name anyway – of that I was absolutely sure. I then paid my tab and proceeded out the door, I did not hear what was said but as we walked out, I could hear a raucous laughter. I did not even care at that point I just wanted out of that store and hoped that this very bad Waffle House experience would not taint the chain for me forever.

I have been going to Waffle Houses for over 25 years and some are better than others, but there are some standards that are common amongst all stores. Ya’ll say hello and welcome to Waffle House, every time, without fail. Ya’ll put pickles and mayonnaise on the plate when a bacon, egg and cheese sandwich is ordered. Ya’ll also keep the stores clean and have cooks who promptly cook the food. This store had none of those qualities or any other quality that was even remotely like any other waffle house I have ever visited.

I just wanted ya’ll to know about this rogue store you have in Alvarado Texas so you can correct the issues before they sour the taste of Waffle House for any other customers.

Duane Smith

Day one of vacation – travel day

So leading up to our vacation there were many preparations that needed to be taken care, who is watching the dog, who will water the plants, do we have enough pairs of shorts and do we have enough of the Ocean Spray sugar free Cran-Pomegranate? Yeah, evidently they do not sell it is Texas so we are toting enough of this powered substance to make over 100 quarts of this stuff. God only knows what they are going to do with it. We had completed all the necessary work and lined up our Niece to handle the bulk of the household chores. So the day of our departure had arrived, at 4:15am no less. Neither of us slept very well the night before, Bride with the excitement of seeing her family and her anxiety about flying and her worry that we forgot to pack something – that all combined kept Bride from getting to sleep until after 3am. And everyone knows, when Bride ain’t sleeping, husband ain’t sleeping either. Not that she was intentionally trying to keep me awake but her up and down did not help me sleep very well either. As we were getting ready she offered a blanket apology for the day, she said I did not sleep, I am excited and I do not like to fly so I am telling you now, “I am sorry for the bitch I am going to be today”. All I could do was smile and know that she would need pampered all day and she would get passed all that.

So we are all ready and Niece gets up, showers and is ready to go, we pile into the van and she wants to drive so she can remember how to get back to the airport when she picks us up. She did not do bad and handled a tricky pull in curbside at the airport so I was impressed. I was laughing inside because I thought it was funny to see a 23 year old without kids driving a minivan, I stopped when I realized – I am a 45 year old man without kids and I drive a minivan as well, anyway I let that go. By the time we arrived at the airport I could not remember if I had let our dog back in, he requires two trips in the morning but I was about 80% sure I did not let him back in. Knowing that Bride would kill me if she knew, I ran around the van when we got out to hug Niece and thank her and tell her she needed to stop by the house because I was pretty sure that I left Newton outside, I also asked her not to tell Bride. I called after we made it through security and asked, I had indeed let him in and at that point I felt I safe to let Bride know that I thought I had left him out but indeed did not – that could have been ugly and I thought my Niece would have perpetual leverage against me holding that knowledge. It was not to be this time my Padawan learner.

So we are at the airport and we check-in curbside, I love that you can do that and always tip the folks who work there well, that has to be a thankless job. Bill was nice and we talked about charging for bags and the price of tickets anymore and how SouthWest and Airtran are the reason that ticket prices across the board have remained low. He indicated that he would not be able to change our seating arrangements, we wanted to be on the side with only 2 seats, it was not to be. As we walk into the airport I notice, as always, folks seem to be in HUGE hurry. I have never understood that, if you know what time your plane leaves, just get your butt there ahead if time. Of all the places that you do not want to be stressed, it is the airport. There are computerized camera systems that can track your facial expressions and make assessments based on that. You think you were stressed before, 5 big men with green teeth and TSA uniforms jump out of the wood work and take you to the body cavity search area – that will peg the stress meter so hard a whole bottle of Zanex will not even put a dent in your anxiety. So in the cattle trough that is the screening area I see a lady who fits this bill, she is sweating, asking folks if she can cut and all the while she is dragging her poor son through all this, he appeared to be 6 or 7 and looked even more confused, tired and pissed off than she did. I was glad we left ourselves plenty of time!

So we get to gate C9 with the rest of the cattle, we are all sitting around, some patiently, some not so much. All waiting for the folks on the loudspeakers to call our section, all secretly wishing we needed special assistance or were able to purchase first class tickets. Why is it that they get to go first anyway, let me meek lead the mighty I say! Anyway we were assigned group 6, whatever that meant. It was seat 26E and 26F and while listening and watching I tried without success to determine the method they were using to board the plane. I did finally determine that before these folks had their coffee the drew straws and flipped tarot card to determine the method. There is no meaning to that madness, not that I could figure out anyway. So by this time Bride’s anxiety is sky high, and she takes “mothers little helper” that the doctor prescribed for her, her perspective on the world got a little more balanced and in turn so did mine. By the time they called group 6 she was sufficiently mellow and I was able to retune my ears to eliminate the frequency of screaming banshee child 4 people behind us – life was good. We board and make our way back to row 26, bumping into people who have their elbows sticking out and waiting for knuckleheads who are trying to stick a humongous piece of luggage into the overhead bin. We finally make it to our seat and 26D gets up and let us in, he has an odd little smile.

Once situated in our seats I noticed smiley, in 26D, had some kind of obsession with his watch. No matter I thought and I quickly drifted off to sleep, I awoke a couple of times to see Bride sleeping and to straighten my neck. I always wind up with a sore neck because when I sleep my head falls over on my shoulder. Bride slept with her head straight up, never faltered more than 1.2 degrees no matter how steep a bank the plane was in. We woke up about 30 minutes outside of Dallas, we were both refreshed. We started talking about our visit and how great it was going to be to see everyone. This is when I again noticed smiley’s obsession with his watch. He would look at his watch about every 105-125 seconds, he would twist the band a bit to the right, then over compensate to the left and then he would shift it back to the starting position. While he was doing this he would be staring at the face of that old silver analog dial like he was attempting to calculate the passage of time down to the femto-second (one millionth of one billionth of a second). He was now making me nervous, why was time so important to him? Was it just a compulsive obsessive issue or was he late, late for a very important date. I do not know, nor did I find out and I suspect I never will.

Upon arrival in Dallas I realized this is the first time I have ever been in this airport, not much different than any other really. On our way through the concourse I noticed a guy on a bicycle, he was a officer of the law and he was able to ride very slow through the crowd, I was impressed with his ability. I noticed he was in excellent shape, cyclist legs, very thin and muscular. Just as I was thinking about how hard it would be to ride a bike through the airport I spot another office of the law, this one on a modified segue, those two wheel self balancing contraptions you see occasionally. I say modified because this one had three wheel and the guy was old, fat and looked completely out of shape. He looked winded just riding this battery powered pony. I remember thinking some sergeant someplace needed to rethink the assignments, fat boy gets the bike and the skinny guy gets the segue, that is what I was thinking – sorry. We stopped and got coffees and made our way to baggage claim to get our bag. It was sitting there waiting for us when we arrived, someone had taken it and 6 others off the carousel and placed them on the floor, lucky us. We grab the bag and out to the curb we go, both secretly betting if Bride’s brother would be on time. He was a few minutes late, construction traffic was to blame.

We made it to the Great state, that is Texas for you uninitiated.

Sorry, could not help it - another political one

Rick Scott and Bill McCollum – really? That is the best Florida has to offer?


Well, if you live in Florida you have seen some targeted ads from one or both of these two, unless you live in the aquifer and can’t receive television, radio and get no service on you 4g gadget. Rick Scott, the fabulously rich Republican contender, has a catchy slogan, let’s get to work. Bill McCollum, the only amazingly rich Republican contender has real solutions, a roadmap for Florida if you will and in this case he will. When I looked there are 23 candidates running for the position of Gov in Florida. My favorite is John Wayne Smith, he is a Libertarian candidate. And with a name like John Wayne how could he be bad and when you throw in Smith at the end he must be perfect. He is an awning installer and Army Veteran, thank you for your service to our country John Wayne Smith.

So back to the two big rich dogs in this fight, I use dogs here both literally and metaphorically. I am not sure how much money is being spent on television ads but those two are everywhere and you know what, I still don’t know a damn thing about how they plan to make Florida better. I know that the company Rick Scott ran was fined by the Government for Medicare fraud and that Bill McCollum using the state plane a lot. While I can muster quite a bit of righteous indignation about both of those things in my economically depressed person economy I really do not give a shit. Big CEO’s and politicians are going to take advantage of the system, they always have and always will so I can let their idiocy go. It is in their nature, just like you can’t stop a bear from crapping in the woods, it is what they do so there is no reason to get hung up on it. When will they focus on developing a plan, telling us what they are going to do for us, instead of name calling at the other dumbass in the race.

I hear each of them talking in nebulous terms about how they are going to create jobs and end pet spending projects and control our borders and not lie to us any more but ya know what, been there, done that and have that tee shirt. We need to realize that these “cream of the croppers” are not going to follow through on their campaign hyperbole. Think about it, when was the last time someone was able to follow through with the bullshit that they had to promise to get enough votes to get into office? The ones running are not running because they care about us, nope they are in for themselves, they have to be or we would not hear things like, we put this forward because we knew it was what could get passed. Not one mention about what is right, or just or best for us, what we could get passed – that my friends as apathy at a level that in not even understandable to me. And we allow this dirt-bags to get away with it, shameful. I am considering starting a new party, the name, the Anti-Incumbent party.

This would be different than the crop of folks running now who are saying “let’s get rid of the career politicians” or “experience you can trust” or “a proven track record” PLEASE. Any dunderhead who thinks anyone in office is representing us more than they are looking out for themselves is diluted. Sorry I usually try not to be so insistent but if you think Charlie Christ or Bill McCollum or Marco Rubio or President Obama or anyone of the other gaggle of elected officials give a crap about you I do not feel that I even want to know you anymore. I mean when was the last time any level of government solved a problem. Crime rate in Jax, cut 10 million from the cops budget, not going to help. Spend a ton of truckloads of money to get people back to work, census workers inflated the number and then kaput. Governor Christ doubling the homestead exemption and then cutting funding to the city, who in turn started charging any number of new fees. Nothing is being fixed, blame is being spread and responsibility shifted and still NOTHING is fixed and spending is never cut. I am nearly convinced that is all a great big game, and that the game is rigged and that game is being played on the backs of common working folks and I for one am tired of the cleats digging into my back.

It is all a crap shoot, the odds of us being able to pick that right one are no better than 195,249,054 to 1, the same odds of you winning the power ball lotto. I hate to say it but I just want all these knuckleheads off my television, them and the endless line of BS they are spraying at us! And by the way Rick Scott, you do need a name tag like your commercial says, you and Bill both need one, it should just say, I am going to end up screwing you in the end so you might as well get ready now, here’s a kiss.

John Wayne Smith, you got my vote, the odds are just as good that you can get something done as the others, and I like that you install awnings, some actual work – good for you!

My Sister, who is a county auditor in Ohio is exempt from any criticism, I believe her to be the ONLY good one out there.

Shoelaces and aglets – what in the world is going on there?

So there I was the other day with a shoelace that was coming apart. I was somewhat disappointed because these shoes were only five years old. 5 years and the laces give out, what kind of shoe is that, they were obviously using substandard laces. I cannot ever remember buying and replacing shoe laces, I am sure I must have done it at some point in my life but for the life of me I cannot remember when. I spoke to other folks who felt the same way. Others said you must buy good shoes that they outlast the laces. I got to thinking and this pair of shoes in over 5 years old, is that a long time to have a pair of shoes? I have a pair of boots I bought when Bride and I were just dating, 20 some years ago and those have the original laces in them as well with little to no wear on them. I guess I am unsure of any trends in this area, how long do the laces last, how long do shoes last, what is the average tension that laces are pulled to? All good questions but I am digressing a bit.

Probably more information than is needed for this oratory but there it is anyway. So I asked some coworkers about it and they tell me they are everywhere, Walmart, Walgreens, CVS, Publix and Winn Dixie. Anywhere you can buy a can of shoe polish, AH I thought I know about that as my shoes are leather and require regular maintenance and regular polishing. So they tell me they are sold in a couple of ways, in length, in inches or millimeters or by the number of holes in the shoe, for example mine have 4 holes on left side of the tongue and four holes in the right side of the tongue. So on my way home I stopped at Walgreens and went to where the shoe polish is sold and low and behold, there were the shoe laces. There were all manner of laces, some sold by the number of holes and some by length. There were inexpensive thin ones and then there were some a little thicker. The thick ones I suspect had a cord center with a woven outer sheath, like the ones that I was replacing.

Since I had taken one out and measured before arriving at the store I felt I was ready, no joy on that. My laces were measured at 33.375 inches and to my dismay, there were no replacements that measured 33.375 inches for sale on this rack. There were, however, some that measured in at 36 inches even and since I had always felt the laces were a touch short I grabbed a pair of 36 inch black ones and a pair of 36 inch brown ones and started for the counter. Perfect I thought, then a thought why not go get two pairs of each, that way I have standby pairs ready in the event of some weird unforeseen lace catastrophe, it could happen. I did not have an expectation that these replacements would last as long as the originals, replacement things rarely do, so I grabbed a primary and backup pair in each color and off I went. The moment I got home I re-laced both pairs of shoes and placed the spares in the shoe shine kit. As I was doing that, I realized the ridiculousness of buying a spare pair. If in the 45 years I have been bumbling through life I have never bought a replacement pair that I can remember why in the world would I buy a second spare pair? That is just my nature and I will most likely expound on that in another oratory.

New, slightly longer, laces installed and looking and feeling right I was happy. While I was looking at them I remembered a shoelace incident in boot camp that made me laugh. I had laced my Boon Dockers (that is what they called our boots) with that first lace draped over the eyelets and our drill instructor read me the riot act, the Navy does not go over bridges, we go under. I had to re-lace them, and many others quickly followed suite. That got me to wondering about shoe laces in general. Where did they comes from, who invented them, what are they made of and what are those little plastic things on the ends, all good question I remember thinking.

I found that the shoelace was invented in 1790 by Harvey Kennedy. I hear tell that there are some sources who say this is erroneous and the true inventor is unknown. It is, I found, a fact that prior to 1790, there were no shoelaces and after 1790, Harvey Kennedy made nearly two and-a-half million dollars (nearly a fifty billion dollars in today’s money) from the patent on his simple leather strands. Two and half million dollars - in 1790 dollars, on shoelaces – whodathunkit? Those first shoelaces were difficult at best to use though, they were simply a strand and had to be forced through the eyeholes of the shoe. That is until another unknown came up with the aglet, the little piece of plastic on each end of a shoelace. They were first introduced in 1791 and the first ones were of stone, or tin. If you were of the upper crust your aglets may have been silver or gold. It was not until the turn of the 20th century that plastic aglets were popularized, the world never walked the same again. As far as aglets go, they were functional, period. Now if you had aiguillettes they were of course more decorative then functional.

In the course of my investigation on shoelaces I also found there are literally countless way to tie a knot in them. From Bow knots to reef knots to granny knots they are all acceptable in tying shoe laces, here I thought everyone tied them the same way. Another thing I found was there are even more ways to lace them up – who knew? Me, I am under on the first one and then right over left all the way up so they are nice and symmetrical. Something as simple as lacing and tying ones shoes, whodathunkit it could be so complicated? Well if you need new laces, you can go and buy them, or replace the shoes, or we could revolt and stop wearing them altogether. If you must tie em up, just don’t make them too tight!

Do you have a favorite place in the world?

The other day I was talking with a good friend of mine, his Momma just went into Hospice care and they had stopped at his favorite place in the world on their way. We started talking about favorite places and he asked me what my favorite place in the world was. I was not prepared with an answer, I truthfully have never thought about pinpointing a favorite place in the world. In the context of our conversation it seemed odd to me that I did not have one, I have been all over the world when I served in the United States Navy. I stood there for a few moments thinking about it and could come up with nothing.

His favorite place in the world is Pope’s Landing and Marina in Danvers Massachusetts. I have heard stories about Pope’ Landing for years so I knew it was an important place for him. He spent some of his youth working there for a man named Iggy Gagnon (I think that was his last name), who was the Harbor Master. I heard great stories of the mentor that Iggy was and I heard horrific stories of finding a dead body while diving down to a car that went down the boat ramp and sank. He told of working with Iggy to get a dock built that was questionably based on the set of prints used and his first time driving the Harbor Master’s boat. We looked on the internet at the place that morning and he showed me his favorite place. He even showed me the bench where his brother had taken his Momma that morning. I know that one day he will be able to go and sit at that bench and smile, remembering his youth, his mentor and his Momma.

So, we talked more about favorite places and he asked me again, so what is your favorite place. I stammered through my memory and found nothing that I considered my favorite place in the world. I thought about gazing up at the Sistine Chapel ceiling, I thought about chasing girls in Rio de Janeiro, I thought about a picnic table in Kiser Lake state park, I thought about wandering around the Great Pyramids, and I thought about the spot Bride and I go in the evening to watch the sunset. Nothing was popping out as my favorite place in the world. I told him I would ponder on it a while and let him know the next day. That evening I thought about it some more and still nothing. I remembered being on the beaches of Barbados, wishing I could smoke dope with the locals in Jamaica and snorkeling in Puerto Rico. I thought about all the cool places that my life has taken me and still could not pick a favorite.

That got me to thinking about the ones I went back to more often than others. I remembered lots of places but still I did not look at them as favorites, only that my life had carried me back to a place that I liked and in some cases loved. So, what makes a favorite place in the world? I then actually started looking at exactly what favorite meant and came up with, 1) a person or thing regarded with special favor or preference, 2) a competitor considered likely to win. 3) a person or thing popular with the public and 4) a person treated with special or undue favor by a king, official, etc. So I realized definition #1 and 3 are what I am thinking about. Don’t get me wrong, I am not without favorites. Vanilla ice-cream – favorite, Strip steaks – favorite, peanuts – favorite, but the words most favorite in the world add a new dimension to the decision making process.

So that got me to pondering some places that I really liked and there was one constant that ran through them all. It was not clear at first but after some pondering it popped right out as clear as day. I was having trouble picking a favorite spot in the world because the one thing that does not change is the fact that impermanence rules everything , the constant is change itself. Each time I visit a place, it is a new experience, things have changed since my last visit. It may be fall now instead of spring or there may be an event going on where more people are present or that it is morning now instead of the evening. There could be a breeze one time with no bugs and the next time no breeze and lots of bugs or any other number of factors – nothing in life is EVER the same when we see it next, at least not for me. We have to take the time to examine our surroundings, to notice that things are different.

So knowing that, a place may have been my favorite while I was there but the moment I left, it could no longer be my favorite. That got me to pondering the question from a bigger perspective and I realized that maybe I was mistaken in my initial determination that I do not have a favorite place in the world. I realized that my favorite place in the world is where ever I happen to be when the question is asked. Like right now my favorite place is right here, pecking on the keyboard talking about my favorite place. As I sit I can look to my right and see Bride watching the TV, I can see the animals doing what they are always doing and I can see outside, the greenery and the pool.

I think we spend too much of our lives looking to the past and wondering what could have been and too much time looking at the future wondering what it will be and we miss the right here and the right now. This, the right now, to me, is the only moment that matters, what we do and feel right now is the thing we truly have control over. The past is history, we can not go back and change it, all we can do is reminisce about it. The future, well we have to plan but it is really more up to sheer dumb luck and cosmic coincidence than anything to do with plans that we may think we are making. Why is that, why are we so rushed through our days that we miss the here and now. Sometimes I used to miss it because the experience is not always pleasant, to sit in mourning for the loss of a parent sucks, I have done that twice and it sucks. So maybe we try to get on past it by remembering the past and planning for the future. Who knows??

For me my favorite place is where ever I am when you ask me. Yesterday on my way home from work my favorite place the corner of Jim Tom and University club, that is where I jumped out of the car and ran over and picked a flower for the Bride. When I got home, my favorite place was watching Brides face when I gave her the flower, and the treat from Dairy Queen. Last week when I was crawled under the jalopy grumbling about how greasy things were, you got it, my favorite place. When I am sitting on the beach watching the sunrise, yep favorite place to be. When I get to cuddle with bride and read aloud, another favorite place. When I was attending my Dad’s funeral, still it was my favorite place. I think whatever you are doing or where ever you are, that should be your favorite place. Enjoy the moments that we get along the ride, where we have been and where will are going is most assuredly taking care of itself. Slow down, get out of your car and smell, then pick that flower and give it to someone special to you and savor the look on their face, it will be your favorite place.